SwissAh Switzerland, home to untraceable bank accounts, finely tuned watches, impartial neutrality and the original army knife (question: if your country insists on playing the neutral card, what do you need an army knife for anyway?) is now also the leader in “humane” fishing techniques.

Humane being killing them immediately upon catching them. In a move typical of EU brillance, the Swiss have made catch-and-release fishing illegal. Live bait and barbed hooks are also illegal except under certain circumstances.

Not only does this fly in the face of conservation (releasing fish to live on, reproduce and contribute to the gene pool), but it’s “humane” roots completely disregard science (fish lack the brain function to feel pain).

Additionally, anglers will have to take a course to demonstrate their humane fishing expertise before they’ll be given a license.

It’s crazy-ass moves (along with a whole lot of other reasons) like these that make me shake my head and be happy to live in the USA.

Of course, what scares me is that Europe is the birthplace of the misguided animal rights movement and is about 30 years ahead of us in the time-space continuum. Everything you see happening across the pond will eventually be brought up here. And because we’re hard-working Americans (and the anti’s are zealot loonies), that 30-year head start will be cut in half. Get ready for more insane moves from PETA, HSUS, etc. as they’ll use the EU’s “humane” laws and game management as a precedence and morale high ground in an attempt to undermine this country’s game management laws and the lifestyle we all enjoy.

—Brian Lynn