Houston? Nevermind

Gayne Young hits the floor at the Houston Safari Club convention and what he finds is anything but conventional.

httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_1.jpg
In the woods the camo on this Jeep helps it blend in to the surroundings. On the highway, not so much.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_2.jpg
This booth had literally everything in the way of safari home decor. Really, see, there’s the kitchen sink right there.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_3.jpg
Oh, that gun safe. Sorry. Guess I kind of blanked out there for a moment.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_5.jpg
No for real lady. There’s a big cat right behind you.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_6.jpg
Murry Customer Leather makes rifle slings. They do not make whips, cuffs, or executioner masks. And you probably shouldn’t ask him about those things. Trust me.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_7.jpg
This lady speaks French. And she does something with hunting. I’m not really sure what. Did I mention she speaks French?
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_8.jpg
While these raffle girls are beautiful most attendees were more impressed with these massive tusks.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_9.jpg
Ummmmm…..
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_10.jpg
This is Dirty Ernie the baboon. And, yes, his owner’s about what you would think.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_11.jpg
Ahhh, breakfast has arrived (yes, outdoor writers really do start drinking that early).
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_12.jpg
The guy on the left is outdoor writer and owner of Global Adventure Outfitters Greg Rodriguez. He hunts probably ten times as often as I do and gets three times as many writing assignments.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_13.jpg
The .500 (on the bottom) will stop and elephant. The .700 will stop a school bus.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_14.jpg
Melcom Van Staden of Limcroma Safaris trying to lure me in his booth.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_15.jpg
I didn’t go in this both.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_16.jpg
The sable is the most beautiful antelope in the world. It’s the name of her company. Look behind her.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_17.jpg
Although widely regarded as Mr. Whitetail, Larry Weishuhn assures me no one actually calls him that.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_18.jpg
This novelty taxidermy piece replaced the “kola bear doing tequila shots” piece after many complaints.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_19.jpg
Somewhere in Africa there’s a peg-legged elephant. I hear he also has a patch over one eye and a funny parrot on his shoulder.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_20.jpg
This woman is from Namibia. It says so right behind her.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_21.jpg
I drunk your thinker than you realize.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_29.jpg
Jamming a Q-Tip into your ear will not remove a Smurf. It will just squish him and leave a big blue smear hanging out of your lobe.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_30.jpg
They just grow up so fast. It seems like just yesterday they were playing with Barbies and here they are packing serious heat.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_31.jpg
This AR-15 Koyote from MG Arms comes in handy in some of your rougher Houston neighborhoods.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_32.jpg
Man Guns and Roses was not even there.
httpswww.outdoorlife.comsitesoutdoorlife.comfilesimport2014importImage2010photo6Houston_35.jpg
Rachel from Atascosa Wildlife Supply smiles despite the fact that her puppet show was just canceled.

Gayne Young hits the floor at the Houston Safari Club convention and what he finds is anything but conventional.