Taste Test

Gayne puts the latest and best food lures and baits to the test.
A taste test.
Wild Cat Blood: Enjoyed the McNugget – like size. Made them easy to pop while watching TV. Tasted like old liver wrapped in a coppery blood laden dough. Were really good deep fried. Cat blood wasn’t feline tasting at all.
Greens N-Raged Juiced: Gel consistency made it difficult to eat so I mixed with some Jell-O to make shots. Smelled like collard greens, tasted like my yard smells after cutting it, burned the back of my throat like no one’s business, and turned my tongue Incredible Hulk green. Made my stool that color as well.
Squirrel Candy: Peanut butter on Meth. It’s like peanut butter only more peanut buttery. Tastes like the sheets after Peter Pan and Jiff went at it in the sack for an afternoon.
Deer CANE: This burned the hell out of my sinuses and left me with a massive nose bleed…what? You don’t snort it? Now you tell me.
C More Hogs: Sweet and nasty just like the label says. Tasted like rank Chinese food dug out of the bottom of a dumpster after a homeless guy used it as toilet tissue. I forever hate the letter “C.”
What does Bollywood actress Aishwarya Rai have to do with Gayne’s taste test? Nothing. Nothing at all.
Predator Pile: Hey kids! Do you like the taste of a fresh gut pile? I sure do and couldn’t stop myself from eating the whole bag. Had hints of blood, muscle, stray hairs, and ground cow hooves. Intestinal lining parts a tad too chewy.
Coon Candy: Hard block was difficult to gnaw on or cut. Ended up licking it for three hours instead. Had a ripe sardine mixed with fish guts and pickle brine kind of taste. Ever since the test I can’t stop washing my food in the creek prior to eating.
Pig Lickkor: Used instead of tequila in a couple frozen margaritas. Heavy corn alcohol taste reminiscent of 87 octane mixed with cooking oil and Sterno. Burnt like liquid fire going down when I ran out of margarita mix and switched to straight shots. Afterward my urine stream was like the acid blood in the Alien movies.
Realtree Roadtrips Backroads Blend: Seeds mixed up just like oatmeal with a little warm milk and sugar. Tasted like your grandfather’s bran supplement – after it went through him. Michael Waddell’s picture on the bag is dreamy.
Fishbites Yeh Mon! Freshwater Catfish Bait: Water active formula meant it had no taste or smell until it hit my tongue then WOW! Tastes like fresh cut bait mixed with really old, old, old cut bait. Has hints of sardines, cat food, and rotted puffer fish. Very chewy, like a wet hairball and wet toast mixed with gum.
BaitStation BearBait: Poured this on vanilla ice cream. Jelly donut sweetness is intense enough to drop a diabetic after one lick. Gel consistency reminded me of snot and was very tough to swallow. This product did not mix well with dairy.